Wednesday, May 14, 2014

First Book of Moses called Genesis-Chapter 1

The first chapter name is a bit of a mouthful. I sense that there's going to be a lot of multiple character perspectives. I can dig it. I just hope all the characters I like aren't going to get killed off.

Looking at you buddy:

See above: a monster.

First impressions:

Lots of "And" Just a whole lot of them at the beginning of every paragraph. Look, I can respect the simplicity but I think James and Jesus would really benefit from a transitions list. 

Our first character is not in fact Moses, but God. So this God guy is really good at getting stuff done. He's just like "I'm going to do this" and then he's all "let there be something" and then "it was so" and then "it was good."

"And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness."

He divides light from dark because presumably dark is a bad influence and light is very impressionable seeing as God just made it and all. 

"And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night."
Light is now named Day. Dark is named Night. God really likes one syllable names for things. I guess it's just more efficient that way and he's nothing if not efficient. 

All that creating stuff happened in the first day. If I go and exercise and clean my apartment, I figure I have license to do nothing after that but not this guy. How does he spend his second day? Making dry land. God is just so on it. The guy just seems to know what he wants and he just goes and does it. 

I'm a little worried that James and Jesus keep saying that everything "was good." I'm sensing some foreshadowing here. 

"And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind."

Now God is decorating Earth with grass, herbs, and fruits and whatnot--essentially playing the world's slowest game of Sim City. 

"And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years." 

Days, seasons, and years get created on the 3rd day of God's arts and crafts project, and presumably inspirational cat calendars along with them. 

 "And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good."

No mention of dinosaurs being created yet. I assume they'll be in the prequel? 

"And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing," 

Cattle are made now. Thought we kind of covered that in the "And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth" section but maybe it's meant to be a jab at the cattle's "moveth" abilities. James and Jesus are so sassy. 

"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness"

God makes man after his own image, presumably because he ran out of ideas after the cattle. 

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them."

God creates women last. Saving the best for last amiright?

"and God said unto them"..."have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth."

We're supposed to dominate everything? I wish God would remind my cat of that because he keeps walking around like he owns the place. 

"And God saw everything he made, and, behold, it was very good."
God's done making stuff now. They keep bringing up that "it was very good" business. So who's going to mess things up on the seventh day? Moses? The whales? The cattle?

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